


There's Still the Sun

by hisfairassasin



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-10
Updated: 2015-02-10
Packaged: 2018-03-11 14:34:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,418
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3329744
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hisfairassasin/pseuds/hisfairassasin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Maybe when he almost dies it doesn't change anything between them. But what happens when its her that nearly dies? What happens when the possibility of losing her isn't that far off at all?</p>
            </blockquote>





	There's Still the Sun

**Author's Note:**

> just a small fic reflecting on the theory of felicity getting hurt in 3x18 and how oliver will have to deal with it.  
> DISCLAIMER: characters belong to the cw and warner brothers. I own nothing.

It’s the sound of her breathing on her own that calms his pulse. It’s the way her chest rises and falls evenly as she lay there asleep that brings something akin to tears to his eyes. He reaches out gently and moves a stray lock of golden hair away from her cheek. He thinks he’ll never get the sound of her coding out of his head ever again. He knows with certainty that the noise will be some sort of soundtrack to his nightmares. Oliver takes her in. The way her full lips are set into an almost pout. The way her button nose scrunches just slightly.

That gives him pause and he smiles.

Her cheeks are tinted a light pink; color, she is color and dear God he almost lost that.

_I thought you almost dying would make you see things differently._

_Make you do things differently._

_Things between us you mean._

Oliver shuts his eyes for just a moment recalling that eventful night of his return. He doesn’t even realize he’s reaching out again until his palm lays gently against her cheek.

She’s so warm, he thinks.

When he opens his eyes again he’s startled to meet her gaze. Oliver’s breath hitches. He knows she’s woken before this but before only Donna had been allowed in to see her. But watching her eyes meet his for the first time in days does something to him. It cracks him open, it leaves him bare and exposed and goddamn it if anyone is going to see him like this he’s fucking thankful that it’s her.

“Hey” he croaks, a lump forming in his throat.

Her gaze is unwavering, unrelenting and he’s lost in it. Lost, lost, lost and found all at the same time. Oliver runs his fingertip along her cheekbone, hearing her breath hitch. He doesn’t realize that she’s moved her hand until her fingers are wrapped around his wrist. His whole body stiffens, staring at the chipped blue nail polish that he knows she would never allow to get that way.

Then he remembers why they’re chipped and why she couldn’t have fixed them. Honestly he knew he was in store to fall apart at some point and now seems to be a good a time as any. Because he nearly lost her, because her heart gave out and in that span of seconds the world was bereft of her. He was bereft of her and it makes something crack in his chest.

A sob pours out of his lips and he feels her small hand cup his cheek. She was dying days ago and in turn so was he. And now she’s here, awake, blue eyes vibrant except for the small trace of sleep. Oliver doesn’t care, doesn’t give a fuck that her boyfriend is probably on his way over. He doesn’t care that she might not welcome him anymore. That he might have destroyed the one fucking relationship that mattered so much.

But he doesn’t seem to notice the way she scoots over carefully as he crawls into the small space beside her. He doesn’t notice the way she’s crying too. He does notice the softness of her skin as he buries his head against her neck. He notices the way her heart thumps evenly reminding him she’s not gone. He notices how his arms fit perfectly around her waist but being careful not to hurt her.

_He’s already hurt her so much._

Oliver notices something else. Her fingers are carding through his hair, her lips are against his forehead. He breathes in deeply, his nose pressing tightly to her pulse point. His tears are slipping against her skin. He moves slightly, shifting until his mouth is right along her ear. “Don’t you ever do that to me again” he whispers fiercely. She trembles and tightens her hold against his hair for a moment.

“I almost lost you” he says pulling back to look at her.

Her eyes are full of unshed tears. Her hands placed right against his cheeks. Her fingers, he realizes, are shaking.

“Never” is the first thing that she says and her voice is hoarse and tired and broken but oh god is it the best sound he has ever heard.

He plans to hear more of it. A lifetimes worth of it. He doesn’t want to be too late anymore. He moves his head to the side to lay a kiss against her palm. Something seems to happen immediately. He feels her stiffen and pull away as if finally coming back to herself. She pushes back slightly and winces and he’s off the bed in seconds.

“Please” he begs and he doesn’t even know what he’s begging for.

She turns her face away from him,

“I’m with Ray” she states flatly

. He nods because he knows this and chose to crawl beside her anyway because anything else is unthinkable.

“I know” he says and she turns to glare at him.

He doesn’t let her say anything though.

“I know you’re with Palmer. I know you might even love him. But there’s still a part of you that loves me too”.

He has no idea that every piece of her loves him. He’ll figure this out later.

“When I was healing…I had a dream” his voice is soft, his eyes imploring. She doesn’t look away from him. “I dreamt of you…I dreamt of staying, of choosing you. But when I woke up and after I came back I thought I couldn’t do it. I thought it was impossible to stay. I had a fight, a mission to continue and I believed that if I chose you I would fail everyone…” his voice catches but he refuses to look away from her. “This life, this path I’ve chosen… I always thought it was going to end with me dead. But three nights ago…three nights ago it wasn’t me who was almost dead. It wasn’t me who flat lined on a cold medical table. It was you. It was you and I watched as they tried to restart your heart and I was sure someone would have to restart mine because you were gone.

I made a mistake, I made a million and one mistakes and the greatest one is thinking that if I wasn’t with you the world would be safe. The world would have their protector because he wasn’t off being selfish and choosing his own happiness. Because that’s what you are, you are happiness. So yes, I know you’re with Palmer. I know you might even love him but as long as theirs a part of you that loves me I wont give up. As long as you don’t tell me to stop I will fight. I’ll fight for you and I am so sorry it has taken me this long to figure it out” he inhales sharply, his tears falling of his chin.

Her tears are dripping too.

“I can’t be me without you. I can’t be anything without you. And for those few seconds I wasn’t…the Arrow or Oliver Queen. I was…hell I don’t know what I was. I’m not done fighting, I just need you to know that.”

There’s a knock on the door and it pulls them both up. He watches as she wipes away her tears as he does his own.

“Hello?” Palmer’s voice cuts through the haze.

He watches as the man comes in and eyes him and her.

“Bad time?” Palmer asks and Oliver nearly laughs.

“No” Oliver says as he shoves his hands into his pockets.

He turns to look at her one last time and finds her gaze locked on him. Something is stirring in her blue eyes. He doesn’t know what though. “Feel better” he whispers and she nods. As he moves past Palmer to the door, his hand on the door knob, her voice stops him.

“Oliver” just his name, that’s all she says but he understands, of course he does.

He looks over his shoulder and sees a hesitant but hopeful smile on her beautiful face. He smiles back and says,

“Felicity”.

He doesn’t look back as he walks out because he knows. A part of him knows and it’s enough for now. He’s not gonna run away this time and for once, for once, there’s no damn rush. He has all the time in the world, and because for some reason the world doesn’t hate him so much, she does too.


End file.
